SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 337: Community

Each of the communities that I am a part of give me the opportunity to see myself as worthy of love, as an acceptable human being, and allow me to experience deep and authentic connections with others through shared experiences, shared desires, and a common thread that runs through all the people involved in each community.

At work, I share laughter, fun, a sense of order and organization, a love for books, and an appreciation for working as a team.

With my Tantra community, I share a love for deep connection, touch, and hugs. I’m honoured and accepted for who I am, I am given permission to play, and I feel seen and witnessed.

In my artistic community, I am inspired by others constantly, share a love for living a creative life, and for beauty. I share ideas and challenges, and feel understood in my desire to be seen by the world.

My dance community gives me the many gifts of movement, of body acceptance, and challenges me to love myself, in both my struggles and my joys. I am given the opportunity to let go and be authentic.

My online community provides so much support and love, and gives me plenty of opportunities to experience my worthiness through inspiring others.

My community of friends and family challenges me the most, and supports me always. They are the nearest and the dearest and bring out both the best and the worst in me. They are my backbone, my ocean, my universe, my heart.

I feel so blessed and honoured to be a part of all these communities, and I treasure each one.

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 251: Feel the Beat

Feel the beat of my heart in my chest.
Feel the beat of the drums.
Feel the beat of the days going by.
Feel the beat when it comes.

Let the beat fill your body and mind.
Let the beat move through.
Let the beat stir your soul.
Let go – the beat is you.

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 223: My Dance

My dance looks like this:

Listening to the soundtrack of my soul.

Moving to the tempo of my heartbeat.

Freezing in my stories of unworthiness and insignificance.

Noticing the resistance and gathering enough energy, and sometimes a push from another, to melt the pain.

Allowing, controlling, letting go, swinging back and forth between the extremes, and recognizing that this is who I have chosen to be.

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 77: Energy

That’s kind of weird. I chose to listen to “Energy” by Collective Soul a few times today already, and now I see that it’s the word for the day. The lyrics mean nothing to me, but the song does have the ability to get me moving.

This is a lesson I need to keep relearning (see Day 75 about lessons): Keep moving! Lately, I have been wanting to think less and feel more; to obsess less and be present more. Trying to “stop obsessing” is like trying to to get me to not eat Nutella when it’s right in front of my face: not going to happen. I need something else to draw me away, and something effective. It turns out that my body is the answer (which I knew, but conveniently forgot. Again.)

When I dance, I don’t think. When I dance, I don’t obsess. When I dance, I build energy, I create energy, and I have energy.

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SelfLove365, Day 36: Movement, Dance

Movement is a natural expression of our bodies. Dance is the outcome. “We are always dancing,” I have been told. It’s true. Every caress, every blink, every spasm, every twist and bend: all of it is a dance.

I hear people say often, “I can’t dance.”

Yes, you can.

You already are. Just put the music on. Or not. We don’t even need the music. It’s all around us anyway. Just listen, and move to the music you hear.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 21: (dance)

When I feel like I’m not good enough, I dance.
If I am feeling rejected or not worthy, I dance.
Today I thought I wasn’t succeeding at life, so I danced.
When I have a reason to celebrate, I dance.
You know what I really want to do? Turn on my music and dance in the aisle of an airplane, and get everyone to join me.
When I’m bored, I dance. OK, I admit, I am never bored.
When I go out to dance, I dance.
When my back is out and I’m in pain, I dance (and yes, it always helps).
If I am feeling sad and lonely, I dance.
Before I start painting or creating, I dance.
To connect to other people in a way like no other, to really know them in an intimate way, I dance.
When I am lying in bed sick, in my thoughts, I dance.
In the shower, I dance.
In the kitchen, I dance.
In my car, I dance.
In the aisles of Safeway, I dance.

My friend said to me, “we are always dancing.”

When I live, I dance.

Self Portrait Thursday and a 5-minute poem

Today is the final day for this module of Core Connexion teacher training. I’ve been dancing all week, going deeper, growing. Yesterday I discovered a power animal for myself: a giant snake – an anaconda, perhaps? We do many exercises apart from dancing, and one was a 5-minute poem or text based on 5 words: bones, breath, spirit, tree and movement. I finally understood what some people go through when they are supposed to do a drawing exercise, yet are under the belief that they can’t draw. My first thought was, “I don’t write poetry.” As it turns out, I am pretty happy with it. So I guess I do write poetry.

In the movement of the tree,
I see the breath of me.
In the stillness of the tree,
I sense the bones.
In the silence of the tree,
I hear my spirit.
In the body of the tree,
I feel whole.

Class One nature walk.

Gratitude Tuesday

Today I am grateful for:

• the support I get from my back, my legs, my feet
• being in good enough shape (I’m referring mainly to my back here) to dance for 7 days straight
• having the opportunity to dance for 7 days straight (I am grateful to my mother-in-law for picking up the kids and making dinner, and for having the financial means to make this happen)
• allowing myself to become fully present during dance
• from yesterday, the qualities I discovered I have within myself: stillness, fun, groundedness, rest, growth, connectedness, playfulness, flexibility, and curiosity.
• intimate connections on the dance floor
• touch

Self-Portrait(s) Thursday

Shopping with my daughters. Hanging out in the funky change rooms.

Feeling beaten by the gremlin after a day of self-bashing.

Pre-dance reflection.

Post-dance gratitude. Enjoying the late evening sun.