Author Archives: belknits

About belknits

38-ish mother of 3, artist, and creator of crafty stuff made out of paper, glue, yarn, and other things. Always trying to be a better me... and always trying to accept myself for who I am RIGHT NOW.

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 245: (attract)

When I think I’m not being successful, I’m not.
When I feel small, I am.
When I feel unworthy, this is my experience of life.

I know this, and have been choosing these things, and pretending that this is out of my control, as if I haven’t made my life with my thoughts, my behaviours, and my way of being in the world.

I’m finally beginning to see out of this fog, to know that I can choose success, and be successful.
I can feel big, and be so.
I can feel worthy, and bring worthiness into my life.

I attract to my life the things that I want, that I think, and that I do.

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 244: Structure

The riverbank through which I can flow.
The schedule within which I can create.
The boundaries within which I can release.
The safety within which I can let go.
The container within which I can surrender.

I create one and then the other will follow.

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 243: Settle Into Myself

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Usually, there is so much internal resistance and mental anguish.
I resist the judgement.
I resist being too much or not enough.
I struggle with the way I am, or at least, the thoughts that tell me who I think I am.
I struggle and resist, and struggle and resist.
And then some days, like today, the clouds part, and I realize I am wasting my time being stuck in all that muck. Why not just accept that sometimes I am a little crazy, or judgemental, or too much. If I just accept it, then I can stop trying to be what I’m not, and move on to focusing on what I do want in my life.

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 242: Purge + Organize

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Everyday I glance at the unused shelving unit, the old winter tires, the torn and beaten up shoes, the stack of mail, the books I don’t read, and the children’s toys that no longer see any action. “Tomorrow. Tomorrow I will get to these things,” I think. But tomorrow becomes today and it’s still not done, and my mental energy is being spent, day after day, on things that are no longer wanted.

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 241: Relating

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Do I ever really see you for who you are, without any of my own filters, stories, judgements, hopes, wishes, comparisons, or desires? Is it even possible?

Relating includes as many of these things as I allow, and even more: the things I am unaware of, the things I am blind to, or forgetting in the moment, the things I just can’t help but include as me.

But I guess that’s the reality of who I am: me plus the filters, stories, judgements, hopes, wishes, comparisons and desires. And I am in relationship to you, with all of your filters, stories, judgements, hopes, wishes, comparisons, and desires.

Let’s be gentle with ourselves and each other. There’s a lot of stuff between us.

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 240: Concentrate

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kids sad home lonely words marriage shame guilt lonely tired unsure artist failure crazy thoughts bizarre jobs money food homeless fires pain back drawing people judgements sleepy cave focus resume desires sad right wrong wondering stupid self-sabotage needs wants pleasure deserving day by day baby spinning clothes clinic support gym food lunches school work bills government divorce fault forgiveness crystals hospital garden holding kisses

breathe

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 239: Keep on Moving

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Movement is the key for me. It helps me to get unstuck when I am stuck in my stories. It gives me joy when I dance. It lessens my pain – in my back, in my heart, in my mind. It is what propels me to the next stage in my growth.

People speak of being rather than doing, to remember to allow what is happening to us to just be present, rather than feel the need to push through it, or do something about it. When I speak of movement, this is also what I’m referring to: the ability to move through my feelings, by allowing them to be there. Movement may sound like “doing”, but I’m referring instead to the opposite of stagnation and resistance. Instead of fighting what life brings me, I will keep on moving, feeling, and allowing (being).

To learn more about the SelfLove365 project, click here.
To join the SelfLove365 project, click here.