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And the winner is…

Anja!

Congratulations, Anja! You win a free copy of Artful Blogging!

Thank you to everyone for your comments – I loved reading about how you celebrate yourselves!

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SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 52: dem Mom Skillz

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I may not do these things all the time (OK, I know I don’t, and I know I preface this way because I’m a perfectionist and wish I could do these things all the time, but feel bad that I don’t), but these are my mom skills that are working, most of the time:

  1. Patience. Yeah, I’m having particular trouble ignoring the times that I am not patient, but if I’m really honest, I’d say that these moments are few and far between these days – it’s easier now that they aren’t toddlers.
  2. Mean what I say, and follow through. I’m pretty good at this one, perhaps because I’m stubborn. Haha!
  3. Listening. My goal is to always listen and thoroughly, with eye contact, with presence, to my children – in a way that they feel heard. It doesn’t always happen, and I’m particularly hard on myself when it doesn’t. Sometimes I’m distracted, or busy, or both. But still, it’s my goal. Constantly.
  4. Quality time. This is directly related to #3.
  5. Hugs. Lots of them. Again, I’m not perfect at this. I want to give them more hugs than I do. Although sometimes, I give more kisses than my son appears to want (he wipes them off). Like Charlotte Diamond sings, “four hugs a day, that’s the minimum”.
  6. Open, candid, honest. I have spoken to my children about sex and puberty and related topics, with candor and openness, since they could speak. I feel strongly that knowledge is power and particularly in this area, I want them to have a sense of strength, power and wisdom when it comes to their bodies and their sex lives.
  7. Teaching responsiblity. My children have been doing chores for many years now – age appropriate things that I resented doing when I was asked as a teenager to start doing for the first time. They are learning what it takes to keep a house in order, learning how to work together, and sometimes they even enjoy themselves. I’ve even heard these words spoken:  “cleaning toilets is fun!” and “cleaning mirrors is my favourite chore”.
  8. Setting examples. The best way I know how to do this is by taking care of my own needs. I go dancing once a week, and have been for the past ten years. I go away on holiday without the children, and take naps or quiet time as needed. I express my anger in healthy ways.

SelfLove365, Year 2, Day 35: Attention

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Pay attention! She’s calling you, asking to be seen and heard.
Instead, you look away, and tell her you’ll be back later, stop bothering me, I’m busy, leave me alone, I want to be free.
I DON’T WANT TO FEEL YOUR PAIN.
Pay attention! She’s not going away. She will always be with you.
Listen to her voice.
Tell her you love her.
Be gentle with her. She just wants attention.
This is your job, not theirs. You are the only one she wants to hear from. So, say something nice. Go on.
Remember. Remember. Remember.
You keep trying to drown out her voice. Loud music works. So does food. So does late night searching for the attention that you don’t want to give to her.
She wants it. She needs it.
She. Will. Not. Give. Up.
PAY ATTENTION.
NOW.

Back in the Studio!

After that quick taste of summer, school has started and I am finally able to paint again! Yippee! I am scheduling in painting time (among all my other fun things to do) daily using my new calendar app. It’s funny to me that most people who asked me how often I paint thought it was daily, but it was usually only once or twice a week.

Finished up these two and there are more coming! These will be available in my Etsy shop soon, but until then, contact me if you are interested in purchasing.

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Speak, 24″ x 24″, $680

 

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“In the Garden”, 12″ x 24″, $500

Painting Slowly=New Ideas!

SelfLove365: Day 190

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I spent the afternoon painting at Lovecraft Gallery, which means company, different music than I’m used to, and a change of scenery. I found myself painting slowly; it almost felt too slow, after all the 20-minute paintings I’ve been doing! After a discussion of tentacles, I noticed that there were tentacle-ish shapes appearing on my painting, something new. They look more like brains, or Korean graffiti, maybe. I’m liking it, whatever it is.

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SelfLove365: Day 180

Shame.
Loving myself in shame is tough. I feel all the shame of my lifetime, all the judgements from others, all colliding in me at once.

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SelfLove365: Day 178

Funny (on rare occasions).
I’m funny at least once a year.

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